For confidentiality reasons, I’m calling this client Katy. Katy was working, not disabled, aged 25 and living with her Mom and sister.
She self referred to Toolbox because she felt ‘stuck in a rut’. She had been to university and had completed a degree that she was not using in her job now. She was on minimum wage and doing a job that she didn’t like. She felt that she had let herself down because she had left university and not been able to secure a job, using her degree. She felt very low, had little confidence and was unhappy with her relationship with her dad.
I met Katy in a pub to have a coffee in the evening as she had work and we completed a Toolbox. She was quite tearful at first and we broke down how she was feeling about different areas in her life. It was clear that she had no confidence, she was nervous about job interviews and she had lost her drive. She also felt that her dad put her down.
We talked about positivity, I showed Katy an online course about confidence and assertiveness that she could complete and she looked really interested in it. I encouraged Katy to talk about what she has achieved and list it down. It was clear she was a very kind person who thought about others and didn’t like to upset anyone.
We spent some time going over some interview tips. I talked about seeing a job interview as an opportunity to sell yourself, to see it as a quiz and we also went through some tips to make her feel more confident immediately before the interview, such as getting there early, finding a small room such as a toilet and making herself as ‘big’ as possible in that room by stretching herself out and then doing some breathing exercises.
We talked about the relationship she has with her dad and the fact that she can’t change the way he is, and if she has tried to talk to him about how she feels and it has had no impact, then she needs to protect herself by distancing herself slightly and protecting her own emotional well being while still trying to keep a relationship with him of some sort.
We talked about her love of dogs and how she could use her spare time, volunteering in this area at her local rescue centre which she would take great reward and enjoyment from. We also listed helplines, meditation classes, her current support from her Mom, sister, boyfriend and friends and discussed any other forms of support she may want to use.
She said at the end of the session, when she was leaving with a full Toolbox and an action plan, that she felt happy, relieved and more positive about the future.
I had a text message from her 10 weeks after her Toolbox which said the following..
‘Hi Tracey, hope you are well. I was just thinking about our Toolbox and wanted to thank you again for the time that you gave me that evening-you forced me to think about how I was feeling and the advice you gave me about interviews really helped me (so much in fact, I ended up securing 2 jobs within the space of 2 months after a year of trying!) Thank you!’